Dude, Where's My House? Staffordshire Bull From Nuttall


Fascist tubthumper Paul Nuttall has been caught telling porkies - again - this week, after 'bearing false witness' on his nomination form for the Stoke Central byelection.

Lie 1. He gave an address on Oxford Street, Penkhull, where he has never lived - indeed when questioned by Channel 4 News he admitted never even having been there.

Lie 2. He claimed during his blustering interview with C4 man Michael Crick that members of his team were already living there - despite clear photo evidence that the house - which agents said was still available to rent - was empty..

The false information given on the nomination form could lead to charges - Staffordshire Police are understood to have launched an investigation following 'considerable media interest', or indeed to a legal challenge in the unlikely event of him actually winning the seat.

According to the Stoke Sentinel Mr Nuttall has now 'revealed' that he has moved into the house he was already claiming to live in..........

Since local Labour MPs Ruth Smeeth and Rob Flello were kind enough to drop a map of Stoke off to the out-of-towner, The Prole Star has been giving some thought to places he might like to visit during his brief stay in the city.

Our first thought was local hostelries for pub-lover Paul, within walking distance of his 'home'. The first one we considered was the White Star - however, the pub has been know to bar politicians for life.

Then there's Ye Olde Bull And Bush - surely a winner for a 'True Brit'? However, we thought the drinks might not suit him.....

Then we struck gold - just a short walk away there's the Glebe. Now we're not saying that they'd be delighted with his custom, but torture fan Paul would surely jump at the chance for a selfie outside Oswald Mosley's old Stoke HQ, just over the road.

Thanks to his subterfuge, Paul's new address is firmly in the public domain, so in lieu of a housewarming present, we at The Prole Star have provided a map showing the route to the pub, just in case he forgets where he lives again.

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© 2018 by "The Prole Star".